Perspective-related peeves

In my last post, I talked about the issue of perspective. While writing it, I was reminded of several of my perspective-related peeves, and thought this was a good place to discuss them. When I say ‘peeve’, I want to be clear about what I mean. These are things that frustrate or irritate me personally. They’re not necessarily the same things that get anyone else. In many cases, one of these things showing up won’t significantly affect anything: if someone does them in a public discussion, I’ll be polite and thoughtful and move on.

Seekers and perspective

Another in my continuing series about seekers and what I personally pay attention to is the question of perspective. Like courtesy, perspective can mean different things to different people, but there are some ways it manifests in the Pagan community that I see regularly. Keeping perspective about these things goes a long way.

Seekers & courtesy

In my last post, I talked about there are some things I pay attention to when meeting Seekers. The first one I want to talk about is courtesy.

What is courtesy?

People sometimes think it means formal manners – but I mean something more general, the idea of making the other person feel comfortable and at home in the conversation. Different people and communities also have different standards of behavior or things they care about. For example: my workplace is fairly casual in terms of dress, but it’s expected that people eat lunch together in the lunch room and do some other cordial interactions that aren’t as common in other workplaces.

When someone’s looking to enter a new community (as Seekers are), and especially when it’s one that is fairly small and close-knit, one of the things I’m interested in is whether they appear to be able to pick … Continue reading

Seekers at first glance

I’ve been thinking a lot about seekers recently. (People who are interested in a particular group or tradition.)

I’ve done a lot of teaching of my tradition’s introductory classes, and I answered the group email for over 4 years, which gives you quite a bit of experience (as well as hanging out in various discussion fora online.) I want to do a series of posts on things I tend to pay attention to in Seekers: I’m going to talk briefly about them here, and then expand on each in a longer post (with some examples and ideas about them.)

Initial impressions:

There are four things I’ve found that tend to catch my eye and make me excited about getting to know a prospective seeker better:

  • Courtesy.
  • Perspective.
  • Responsibility and follow-through.
  • Attention to details.

These four all can be shown – in smaller and larger ways – through initial … Continue reading